First of all, your silly parents can’t seem to tell to know which of the seventeen different items on your dresser you are pointing at with desire. Seriously, they pick up every.single.other.thing but the one you want. Hello, why would I want the picture frame? Never mind that I wanted that yesterday. Today I want the hair brush!
Next, they are constantly interrupting your playtime with annoying things like diaper changes. You really could care less if your diaper was sagging below your knees, you’re busy darnit. These blocks won’t stack themselves, will they?
And why do they keep telling you to stop standing on the furniture? They must be threatened by your taller stature from the coffee table and want to keep you down so they feel all big and superior.
Don’t even get started about mealtime. Clearly they are saving the best food for their own plates. They try to convince you that the rice and beans on your plate is the same exact thing that they are eating, but you know better. Fork over your burrito Daddy. And what do you have over there, Mommy? Delicious avocado? It looks awful similar to what you put on my plate but I’m no fool. Give it here, woman. You can have mine. I even mushed it up with my hands a little so it’ll be easier for you to eat.
Oh and one more thing, what’s the deal with the toilet? They take you to a pool every week for swim lessons but you’re supposed to ignore this perfectly splash-able bowl of water? It makes no sense.
Just another day at our house.
Frankly I don’t know how Sarah Beth puts up with us. But I’m glad she does.
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